What's really going on : you're heartbroken - it hurts to be in this situation with no prospect of romance, no togetherness to look forward to. The whole thing about focusing on just work sounds like a not very pleasant experience.
8 of pentacles - 9 of cups - 7 of cups
you put all your efforts into working to get what you want because you have all these aspirations of what you want to be. There's nothing you want more and it feels like it's going to take along time to achieve them. So the success will take ages to come through while right now you are feeling miserable and unhappy. You may be willing to put up with that now but you find yourself asking whether you really are. This kind of delayed gratification with a hell of a lot of delusional hope perhaps seems a lot.
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